2011 year in review

i don't live by horoscopes...

Year 2011 Overview

'Change' is your middle name at this point, Capricorn. You've been through more personal transformation in the past two years than perhaps in your entire life. The upside is that you're getting used to the intensity of it all. It helps that you're realizing the futility in holding on to people and possessions that only stunt your growth. So many layers continue to be shed on a daily basis but this also gives way to unquestionable personal power. Pluto in Capricorn will carry on for another 14 years; so if this is just the tip of the iceberg, imagine who you will be on the other side of your metamorphosis.

This year the focus shifts from a lifestyle focused on gadgets, information and social networking to introspection, home and family. You are about to encounter your most uncensored raw self on levels as of yet unprecedented. Ready yourself, Goat, because this spring an explosion of fiery planets in Aries sweeps the very base of your horoscope getting you back in touch with some of your most primal instincts. Competition, aggression and the need for plenty of physical outlets ensue.

Some long-standing money issues are finally coming to a finish as the planet of illusion and delusion gets ready to move on to your communication sector. You've learned to use your discrimination in choosing where to invest and where to spend. For the next 14 years, instead of worrying about money leakages you'll be working on mindfulness to avoid spacing out. In any case, your way with words is apt to become poetic and inspired, which can only make the world appear infinitely more beautiful.

...yet last years predictions were so spot on, i would not have been able to write it better myself.  so looking forward to what 2012 brings along...

funny friday...

simply sweet...

when i finally

awoke

from my nap...

.

...i realized there

 were cookies

 to bake

i hummed and

 i hawed

and realized

the one's they really

want

 take no time at all

peanut blossoms

and gingersnaps

sure enough

baked and gone

in no time at all

enough said...

even for me

this is unusual

but then...

.

...i've never ever

worked in retail

for an entire year

in my life

wishing you all

 a very merry christmas

new traditions...

this little blog

of mine

has morphed into...

.

a personal diary of sorts

a place to write

my thoughts

in addition to

sharing creativity

it is also preserving

memories

in an electronic format

and this pic is one

i never wish to loose

julie and tj

how i love these two

they have been

 growing up before our eyes

for several years actually

high school sweethearts

college comrades

and now

apartment dwellers

establishing

 new holiday traditions

of their own

it's a marvelous sight

for this momma's eyes

and heart

the best kind of christmas gift

efaith restored...

it's such a euphoric

feeling

 to end the year...

.

...with my faith restored

in mankind

do you remember

my tale

of the broken smoky pfaff

with the seller

from h e double hockey sticks

then the ten paragraph

email from the attorney

at ebay

when i escalated a claim

that could have been

summarized

in one sentence

the ebay buyer protection plan

doesn't cover broken

stinky sewing machines

well believe it or not

after my ego recovered

i bid again on a pfaff 1475

and lost

so i sorta gave up

but oh how i love

 that machine

best one ever made

i have a few groups

of young teens

 waiting in the wings

for sewing classes

i can't wait to

get started

one more machine

 would be ideal

in sarah's sewcial lounge

so i bounced back onto

ebay

and found one

i bid and i won

it arrived today

packaged perfectly...

in the best

 of condition

even better

than my own

and included

a nice little note

from the seller

thank you mario

you made my day

and restored my faith

in mankind

ebay should thank you

i certainly do

making progress...

i'm so very far

behind

in my paperwork...

.

...but it's quite boring

so to reward myself

each month i finished

i stitched one more row

i'm up to november

which means

ten more rows

of x-rated

 are complete

loving luscious...

and making some

progress

with the hand...

.

stitching

one of the most

frequently heard

comments

when i announced

i would be opening

 a quilt store

nice

you'll be able to sew all day

not

doesn't happen often

until i started

my hand stitching project

i'm addicted

once again

the purple knickers...

twenty years ago today

that's how sarah and i

often start posts over...

.

on her blog

it's fun to see what

we were up to

twenty years ago today

at times i think

twenty years is so long ago

and then i look

 at the photos

and it seems like

just yesterday

tonight

as i looked at what

we were doing

i huge wave of emotion

comes over me

first off

it's the purple velveteen

the true color doesn't shine

 in the pics

tj's knickers were made

of a rich deep

luscious purple

the top of sarah's dress too

the matching plaid

 was heavy, gorgeous taffeta

brought in especially for me

by jay broida the owner

of cutting room fabrics

he knew about my obsession

 with purple

so on one of his

 new york city buying sprees

he had me in mind

and my little girl

he was so excited to show me

i couldn't bring myself

 to tell him

that sarah was not doing well

in fact

the doctors were

starting to loose hope

her lungs were

continually collapsing

filling with fluid

she was aspirating liquids

to cause pneumonia

that would not respond

 to medicine

still i sat in my sewing studio

in the wee hours

 of the morning

to stitch up this

matching ensemble

for brother and sister

today as i look at

these photos

i recognize there

was a greater journey

one of immense teaching

the brother

the one who stood beside her

who protected her

without question

is right beside her

nearly every single day

i truly could not be more proud

of the man he has become

my heart swells with pride

each time i see the two of them

i hear them

engaging in grown up

conversation

yet my heart allows them to go back

to the day they

were wearing

taffeta plaid and

 fancy purple knickers

when life comes...

together and

things start

to make sense...

.

have you ever

 experienced

one of those times

i think i did
 today

all those years of

snow plow sam lessons

followed by

hockey, hockey and more hockey

and then it ends

or so you think

a few years later

sitting in world history class

only by a series of very

unique circumstances

boy meets girl

hearts go pitter patter

girl is nationally recognized

ice dancer

without a partner

sounds like a movie

sarah and i have watched

over and over again

wonder how this one

will turn out

sure is fun watching

i always thought

 a toe pick

would have been

 a fine choice

angelina needs a family...

it's the time

of year

when the angel...

.

...tree goes live

over on the

reece's rainbow website

it's the time

of year

when hearts soften

and funds are

raised

to help get the

sweet adorable children

born with down syndrome

living in orphanges

into the loving

caring homes

of a family

sweet

 adorable angelina

with her beautiful

red hair

and big brown eyes

is almost four years old

she needs a family

now

or she is in danger of being

transferred

where her life

will be even less than it is now

and death

is likely

please help pass the word

angelina needs a family

if you can't be her family

will you please

consider making a donation

 to her fund

by clicking here

familes are often out there

it's just the expense

 of the adoption that

holds them back

help us give a holiday

miracle to angelina

i love december...

it's the only

time

of the year...

.

...i can have

 two heaping scoops

of my all time

 favorite flavors

peppermint stick and

mint chocolate chip

i think i'll go

 curl up

next to the warm fire

to eat my ice cream

delicious

funny friday...

hand therapy

i believe

the current

word is...

.

...retro

reminiscent of things past

remember when i introduced

hello luscious to x-rated

after some thought

i decided to take it back

a decade or two

ok maybe three

or nearly four for me

when all blocks

were stitched

by

hand

oh yes i can hear the gasps

you should listen when

customers come

 into the store

and see me pulling the needle

through the fabric

while i'm walking about

i'm loving it

the best hand therapy

ever

does a great job on

the mind too

total relaxation

the end product

retro in the best way

although i've heard

that look is current once again

black friday...

i'm so excited

about my

shopping...

.

...experience

never will you find me

 standing in long lines

winding around a big box store

i let my fingers

do the shopping

on my favorite creative site

etsy

this little quilted beauty is by

tresa in molalla oregon

it will soon be hanging in

sarah's sewcial lounge

won't you consider

supporting artists

throughout the land

this holiday season

gratitude...

purple profile...

years ago

even before this

next photo...

. 

was taken

a friend gave me a card

that reads...

you are a purple person if:

you are imaginative,

sensitive, artistic and

sophisticated

you have noble ideals

 and a keen appreciation

of the cultural

you are alert, demanding,

 foresighted, confident

resourceful,

spontaneous and highly independent

you take delight in the beautiful,

the gracious, the sensitive,

but maintain an attitude of

critical appraisal

you are active in the support

of things you believe in

and are concerned

with the pursuit of truth

 and other human values

you take chances

 and believe that you must do so

 to make the most of what

 life has to offer

purple is an exclusive

 unique color

and it is truly a unique individual

who holds it dear

twenty years ago today

as i bared my shoulders

 for the world to see

i did not see as much

of myself

in that message

as i do today

shattered dreams

precious iris

sweet adorable girl

forever angel...

.

Iris Catherine Palma

7/7/10 ~ 11/20/11

...gone much too soon

for weeks i've followed

 your daily struggles

open heart surgery

followed by complications

 fluid filled

and collapsed lungs

infections

irregular pressures

pulmonary hypertension

plummenting oxygen saturations

then a complete code

each hour i relived the emotions

with stephanie and anne

as they were posted

you seemed to be following

 the same path as my sarah

day by day

hour by hour

i felt the constant heartbreak

followed by

intense elation

when one tiny flicker

of activity on a monitor

gave new hope

i wanted so to believe that your

outcome would be different

that your mommas

 would hold you once again

that they would see

 your precious smile

instead what they have right now

are shattered dreams

and broken hearts

i know there were several girlies

waiting to take your hand

kristen, carly and lois

 to name a few

a party in heaven

where that extra chromosome

is celebrated

in glory

 i am sure

take it and make it...

lusciously x-rated...

my mind

and body

are aching...

. 

...for some

sewing time

it's been much too long

since i've had access

 to a machine

 so tonight

 i am sitting down

with needle and thread

thought i'd do something with

hello luscious

the newest release

from basic grey

it won't arrive in stores

until february

which makes

x-rated

a carrie nelson schnibble

 the perfect pattern

for a

 valentine

 creation

11.11.11

surround yourself...

smokin' hot...

flipped the page

in the

photo album...

.

...the one from twenty years ago

and found this

at first i was just going

 to pass it by

then my honey came down

and told me

 i looked smokin' hot

it was the reference

to fire

 that made me

decide to scan it

just in case

i never want to forget

that yes

there was a day

when i'd show my legs

i also remember

finishing this outfit

on the way to the event

as john drove

i sewed

typical of our life

back then

wouldn't change a thing

though

conflicting emotions...

from the moment

you look

into his eyes...

.

you know the day

will eventually come

it seems so far off

in the undefinable distance

it's easy to pretend

 it will never happen

then it does

the day your baby boy

moves out

 into the world

on his own

the funny thing

i've been hinting of late

sometimes in a subtle way

and sometimes not

still

 he didn't seem

 to be in a hurry

to flee the parental nest

then out of the blue

he tells me he is about

 to sign a lease

turns out he has been looking

for a great many weeks

that's my boy

i should've known

mr independent with

a well thought out plan

he took me for a preview

but not

until he first took

 his sister

which of course

 melted my heart

last evening he told me

about a new

herringbone couch

a side chair

a chocolate brown table

 he showed me

 a stripped pillow

he was so elated

 i was happy to share

 in his excitement

until he told me

about buying a

king size bed

and that's when it hit me

he's leaving

for good

my baby boy

has grown into a man

in a flash

of an instant it seems

i had to fight the tears

from streaming down my face

i wanted to run and hide

curl up in a corner

so this is what it feels like

my head

 tells me it's time to go

my heart

wants him to stay

somewhere

 in the middle

i'm as proud as i can be

he'll always have a place to visit

and a permanent corner

in my heart

beautiful heartbreak...

a beautiful yet heartbroken soul and friend shared this with me. i thought it perfect to begin the season of thanks and gratitude. it's such a powerful reminder those around us may be hurting much more than we know. yet through all the heartbreak therein lies the beauty...

would you like a pony too...

when tj asked

to be a cowboy

for halloween...

.

...i asked if he'd like

a pony too

turned out to be the

most winning costume

ever

by all who wore it

over the years

today it turns up

twenty years later

a perfect visual

for what's about to happen

as the lone ranger rides

into the sunset

out there

on his own

not exactly

atop hi ho silver

rather

 inside a red taurus

either way

he's holding the reins

in total control

so proud of you son

my two sons...

fiveteen years ago today...

i was blessed

with the miracle

of a second son
two boys
i wasn't sure i was ready
 or worthy
of such a responsibility
jeepers have i made
 some mistakes
said a few unkind words
held an unrealistic
expectation or two
today i know this though
i would give
 the sun
the moon
 and the stars
for these
two divine creatures
two amazing young men
as different as night and day
yet both perfect
just the way they are
motherhood
i've come to realize
is the greatest of all blessings
full of challenge
wonderment and intrigue
i've also come to learn
there a few times that only an
i'm sorry
 followed by
please forgive me
will do
each year they grow
so do i
and i hope to
be granted the gift of
continual learning
 which will allow me to
share in their
splendor
for many years to come
happy birthday matt
i love you

quilt shoes...

be honest now...

...could you resist?

.

me either

the best

impulse shoe buy

of my lifetime

well at least since i

turned fifty

when

comfort trumped

style and heels

love my quilter's keens

found my

harvest mary jane's here

believe...

at long last...

i've finally

found my

sewing machine...

.

...again

after being buried

under boxes and junk

for so long

the last few weeks

my body was craving the

motion of the machine

i started with a

little project

that was almost finished

love me some

chocolate and blue

from verna

by our favorite kate spain

thought that would

give me a boost to

jump back in with both feet

ugh ugh triple ugh

first i have to finish cleaning

the cutting counter

just never enough

hours in a day

a sugar valley beauty...

do you ever

stumble

upon a photo...

.

...that just brings a smile

to your face

i had that experience

today

over on facebook

saw this beauty

posted on the gammill page

and i grinned

from ear to ear

love, love, love

 the fabric and design

the colors are divine

so i clicked a few more

times to see just

where the picture

came from

sugar valley stitches

turns out it's not too far away

in bellbrook ohio

even found more pics

of the purple beauty

maybe one day soon

i can connect up with

amy bouchard

it's truly becoming a small

world thanks to that

other redhead

you know the guy

famous for starting this

facebook thing

no words...

it isn't often

that i can't

find words...

.

...words of comfort

words of inspiration

words of wisdom

even words of criticism

yet tonight

i am just plain numb

unable to think

unable to read

unable to process

just a few short months ago

i posted on this very blog

one lite candle

in memory of one

sweet precious girl

carly elizabeth george

who was taken from this earth

much too soon

tonight

we have two candles

one for carly

and one for her brother brad

who lost his life

 in a house fire last evening

the very house he and carly

shared memories

i do not know how this

momma and papa

joany and paul

can possibly survive

such a tragedy

two children

and all their wordly memories

gone in such

a short amount of time

just last month their daughter

ashleigh

a beautiful young woman

left for basic training

with the united states navy

how will she ever

 regain her strength

i have no answers

only questions

and a very strong need

to reach out to joany and paul

in whatever way we can

to help them simply put

 one foot in front of the other

the sadness is unbearable

please pray

a perfect plan

october is national

down syndrome

awareness month...

.

...they say that nearly

twenty three years ago

at the moment

of conception

a somewhat rare

anomaly occurred
yet it would be

several months

before i'd know
for i was

 blessed with a

a perfect pregnancy

a quick and easy birth

then early
the next morning

august tenth of eighty nine

the doctor shared the news

forty seven chromosomes

one extra for my girl

the shock

 it rocked me to the core

i didn't understand

why were we the ones

to travel down this road

today as we stand

 in our store
surrounded by bolts
of fabric you've selected

 in your favorite team's
 colors of scarlet and gray

there is nothing

 that could bring

more joy

 than to clearly understand

 the absolute perfection

 of the grand

 and miraculous plan

courage...

inspired

by the moda designers

sharing...

.

...memories about their

experiences

with country fairs

i dug into a box

with the pics

from the summer

i arranged for

my girl scout troop to

 attend the ohio state fair

as i looked at lots

 of really good photos

i came across this one

i look scared

to death.

and i probably was

fear of heights

it's always been there

yet i couldn't look like

a coward

in front of the girls

i was suppose to be

 the leader after all

today

when i look at these photos

courage is what i see

 it's not visible

to the naked eye

it was hidden deep within me

like a silent strength

i was traveling

with a group

of young women

trusted to my care

and

a very medically fragile daughter

one who could have collapsed

in my arms

 at any time

without a moments

notice

at the time

i was given

loads of courage

to move beyond my fears

today

looking back

i'm not sure how i did it

but i did

renews my faith

 that

one won't be given

more than they

can handle

today i am most grateful for

the good times

the memories

and the courage

it can move mountains

what if...

the gifts in life...

as if

perfectly

on cue...

. 

i turned the page

of the photo album

from twenty years ago today

and this picture is what

i found

 a tiny tj

just three and one half years old

in my office

as the regional director

for united way

i had multiple offices

this is the one in geauga county

i'd often have a few tasks

needing completed

on a saturday

especially if i had taken

time off during the week

to tend to sarah's medical needs

i almost always

 took tj with me

it gave him a break from being with

his medically fragile sister

and he was such a good boy

he would sit

very patiently

playing with the calculator

for hours if need be

he loved punching in numbers

and then seeing the machine

tape continue to spew

out until it reached

great lengths

then he would take

a red pen

 and circle all the numbers

i had forgotten about those days

i suppose he was

destined to be a finance major

in college

all the way back then

which makes finding these photos

so perfectly timed...

...today

 i handed over

 the financial reins

of our company

american medical computing inc

to this boy

all grown up now

i'm confident he will do

 an excellent job

take it to the next level

and beyond

and that my friends

will allow me to spend

more time creating

in the house of fabric

like those

chairs behind us

the minute the man

who had this job before me

 moved out

i took them home for a weekend

and reupholstered them

with the fabric you see

gave the office

a twinkle of sunshine

tj i love you son

you've worked hard

you've earned the title

of cfo

dad and i are so proud

and honored to have you

in our family