tip toe through the tulips...

i first planted

tulips

at our home...

in south euclid

back in the fall

of nineteen eighty eight

they were beautiful

that first year

the next august

we delivered sarah

she arrived with an unexpected

extra chromosome

and all of a sudden

tulips

took on a new meaning

a few years earlier

a woman named

emily perl kingsley

had written a poem

about the shock

of learning your child has

down syndrome

she likened it to going
on a trip

to holland when you

thought you were

heading to italy

i didn't want to go to

italy or holland

so for a short while

i hated tulips

then something wonderful

happened

i feel madly and deeply

in love with sarah

and tulips too

but as life evolved

so did the deer

that were multiplying

faster than rabbits

in our first ring suburb

they ate all the tulips

every last one

thirty years after first

planting those bulbs

i started over

in a new home

nearer the country

i was hopeful

yet realistic

i could hardly contain

my enthusiasm

when i first

spotted sprouts

early in april

then the buds started to appear

followed by flowers

each morning

there seems to be more

and more

tonight

i took jackson out

with me

the sun was shinning

perfectly

and off in the distance

of the flower patch

you can see
sarah's angel

so appropriately

placed

with the tulips

in our new home
new beginnings
with a healthy dose
of gratitude

jackson & nicky

our precious puppies. they bring us so much joy we can't imagine life without them.

jackson richard & nicholas james

                 8.29.16       12.25.17

charcoal sketches

by the very talented

rita minamyer

perfection in bloom...

thirty years

My greatgrandmother's ring. Photos by Martin Lehrman.

one shoe, two shoe...

orange shoe

blue shoe

not the same...

 

 

...shoe

i suppose it

would not hurt

to look down

before leaving

the house

same shoe

different color

match the bag

perfectly though

it's a pink sand beach design

tuscany tote

one of my favorites

batiks by moda

it's been awhile...

since i've

posted to

this little blog

 

of mine

mostly because i've

not had a minute to myself

for very good reasons

my sarah girlie

had a booth at the

national down syndrome convention

with her quilts

truly a dream come true

for both of us

last night i finally

had an evening

to turn on the music

and get creative

i had just the perfect

thing to work on

a miniature

it will be going

in the front window

next month

which is really

in two days

time sure does fly

when you're having fun

purple rain

when the world

looses

an icon...

 we all mourn

 for the man

 the music

 the memories

 the association

 we have

with each song

and the references

 they may bring

 i was watching

 an interview

 last evening

 and an associate

 who once worked

with prince said

some people tell you

 to think outside

the box

 prince

 was never in a box

may we all

 have a bit of that

philosophy

in us going forward

in this thing

called life

 be uninhibited

 be not afraid

be creative

a girl can dream...

right?

of a kitchen

in retro

 

 

turquoise

this one's a

show stopper

i just love it

appliances

from the

big chill

who knew

the house

in california

just

adorbs

check it out

here

just because...

he melts

my

 mom heart...

...and every time
he comes home
it seems
he has grown
another inch
still
he'll always be
my baby
youngest son
he oozes
much love
so very grateful

one happy mama...

it's been a while

since

i've shared...

 

 

...a post about

 my favorite

daughter

it's good

 i suppose

that i have

 just one

that way she

can always be

number one

there was a time

that i questioned

whether we

would ever

share a

love of sewing

not just

because

she would need

to discover the

same infatuation

with fabric

that i have 

 

rather because her

diagnosis

of down syndrome

lead me to believe

she would have

greater challenges

than some

including

 her manual dexterity

for years and years she

had some wonderful

therapists who worked

diligently with her

hour after hour

day after day

 her fingers now work

with the greatest

of precision

her seams are near perfect

her patience

extraordinare

 

today

not only does

she share my love

for quilting

she is also

learning

the fundamentals

of running

a business

it has taken a

very large village to

get us to this
stage in life

for which i am so

 very grateful

for everyone

who has had a place
on this journey

with us
thank you

 

it's been real...

a photo worth celebrating...

it's a tradition

photos of the kids

sometimes...

us parent's too

it was easier when

they were young

all under the same roof

then they age

and off they go

to their own worlds

with a wife and a girlfriend

it's hard sometimes

knowing just

how far to push

when to let go

how to stay connected

add in a grudge

 or two

a betrayal

hurtful words

and life gets even

more

 complicated

and at times confusing

this little family

is fractured right now

heartbreaking

yet necessary

with time comes healing

maturity

perspective

and hopefully

 new found energy

to move forward

to create new beginnings

thankful for the

happy times

such as this picture

taken on sister's birthday

for those memories

keep your heart

beating

je m' appelle joice

it has been

a long

long time...

 

since i studied french

so long

that i barely

remember

most words

of the beautiful language

still

like many

my heart fills

with just the mention

of the eiffel tower

the streets of paris

so when word

first

starting spreading

that terrorists

had struck

the city of love

it was hard to

believe

as more details

surfaced

there is no denying

the world is

changing

and for that

i feel helpless

and afraid

scared for my

loved ones

yet we can't let fear

dictate

our every move

so i did what i know best

i took

 to my sewing machine...

 

...creating a circle

using fabric

purple of course

with eiffel towers

to form a dresden

or friendship circle

for in my world

if we all just started

loving a little more

hated a little less

just imagine

the difference

we could make

a different kind of mother's day...

i've learned over

the years

that life is full...

.

...of unpredictable moments

your day to day

existence

can be humming along

and then

out of nowhere a

situation presents

that hits you

upside the head

 like a two by four

as i sat across

the table

from my son and his wife

the words stung

like alcohol to

a freshly opened wound

my tears feel freely

not just for me

but for my mother

it took me back

to a place
earlier in my life

where i too

said many unkind things

and for the first time

i was sitting in her seat

i read once

that every child

grows to hate their mother

and you will know when they

have matured

by the day

they learn to accept and love

her for who she is

no longer will you see

her short comings

rather you will

appreciate her care

her support

her love

for me

it took a while

to almost fifty five really

the greatest blessing

now

is the opportunity

 to observe my momma

with my princess of a girl

the two have become

best buds

for that i am most grateful

as i recognize

not every adult child

is given this

second chance

with their

mother still on earth
yet we know
those days are coming to a close
soon
my mother is dying
she has terminal cancer
it is slowly yet
surely taking away her
health
her good days
are becoming less and less
what would i change
not a thing i suppose
for our trials and triumphs
have shaped me into
who i am today
a very grateful daughter
who has the ability to
turn the bad into the good
the pain into a
promise
for a better tomorrow
no doubt
sad
yet brutifully abundant
with rich blessings
motherhood i've learned
is a journey
not a sprint
rather more like a
 marathon
that has not yet been run
because
we're always
in training

sweet child of mine...

my baby

the third born

always...

...always, always

keeps me on my toes

his little antics

are never too bold

just enough to

have me scratching

my head

wondering what i could

do different

perhaps better

as a parent

he has a heart of

pure gold

though

a work ethic

like none other

at eighteen

he busses tables

at a country club

hard grunt work

last night

he came home

with flowers

for me

just because

they are

purple

and he knew

i'd love them

which i do

i love him

even more

hello march